oh so naked

oh so naked

That’s the only word I can think of to describe me at this moment.

Naked. To me it means: vulnerable, empty, full, scared, joyful, alive, alone, serious, carefree. It is my word to encompass my paradox.

I spew words that indicate openess, strength and wisdom…and then I hide behind them.

I color canvas then hide behind my art.

I reveal my beauty and then hide behind my mask.

I work for myself and hide behind my suit.

Now, the trick is to embrace the paradox fully and keep working on not holding myself back. I’m afraid of being rejected because of my intensity, divinity. It happens often.

Me, the hardass: But, so what? It’s not like I haven’t rejected myself so many times. Why would it matter more when the rejection comes from others?
Me, the gentle lover: It doesn’t. It’s only my projection. The rejection comes from within. The without is my way of bringing it to my attention.

Well, I am paying attention now.